Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Only in Britain!

Well, maybe not only in the Mother Country.

Fresh off the wire...


My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I
gave the clerk a £5 note. Our total was £4.20, so I also handed her a
Twenty pence piece.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.'
I said,'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me £1 back.'
She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my
request. I did so, and he handed me back the 20 pence and said 'We're
sorry but they could not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then
proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change..

Do not confuse the clerks at MacD's.


We had to have the garage door repaired. The GARADOR repairman told us
that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough
motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one GARADOR
made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady,
you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4
and he said,
'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two..'

We haven't used Garador repair since. Happened in Moor Park ,Nr Watford


I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the
Highways Department to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on
our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I
don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

Story from Potters Bar , Herts , UK


My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried and ordered a taco. She
asked the person behind the counter for 'minimum lettuce.' He said he
was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

From South Oxney Herts , UK ...


I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an Irish airport
employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

Happened Luton Airport .... UK


The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's unsafe to cross the
street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged co-worker of
mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.. I explained that it
signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing

She is a Local County Councillor employee in Harrow , Middlesex , UK


When my husband and I arrived at Our Local Ford dealer to pick up our
car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the
service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock
the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was
unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the Fitter/Mechanic, 'its open!'
His reply, 'I know. I already did that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in St Albans,Hertfordshire UK .

They walk among us... and the scary part is that is they have the RIGHT


KG said...

These ar not rare and isolated cases....cue "Twilight Zone" theme..

Anonymous said...

The last line spoils it.

Oswald Bastable said...


PM of NZ said...

Damned right, Os!