Liarbour wants to ban Christmas and January

Whilst still on her whirlwind tour of the nether regions of Orklund, the Minister of Plods has been breathing the smog deeply. So different from the absolutely positively rarefied hot air on the 9th floor of the 'hive in windy Wellytown. Not doing her any good though, the media are just not interested.

She wants to ban hot hot weather, Christmas and January. 'Nothing but a blip' it seems, what with these violent yoof lashing out all over with knives and the like.

the hot summer and full moon were to blame for the recent "unusual events" that had created mad January in South Auckland

Obviously has been looking too closely at the moon through that brown haze. Even tried to tar the Plod in the same outburst.

It's well documented within the police - and we've had a long hot summer - and the view is that we often get things happen in this month that we wouldn't have happening in winter

She has the solution though.

Family and economic stresses of the festive season added to the strain.

Over the holiday Christmas period we traditionally have an increase in family violence, people are at home, and there are the stresses and strains of having your relatives staying and financial pressures. They are not easy to address issues unless we ban Christmas and January

No doubt is a hot topic with which purchase your vote sheeple.